Kellie's Story - Part 6 (part 1 to 5 below)

Happy Feet

Date: 3 November 2008

Our kids love the movie “Happy Feet”, the one with the cute penguin that loves to dance when he is supposed to sing. I can’t help but think of that movie as I lie down in our apartment with incredibly sore and blistered feet after the race on Sunday.

After the crash I had been told that I would not race again. Even when I had physically healed enough to do so, mentally I did not know if I would ever be able to. I thought that I would be the one “singing” on the sidelines rather than being out there “dancing”. Thankfully for everyone there on Sunday I actually raced and was not singing or dancing. To cross the line amongst thousands of enthusiastic age-groupers and their supporters was a fantastic experience. To have my family and friends there was also very special.

I had the usual pre-race nerves but once the starters gun went that all seemed to fade and I just loved being out there amongst it. I especially enjoyed seeing the many kids lining parts of the course with their hands out waiting for a high five. I wondered how many of them would be inspired by the thousands of athletes that turned out.

I loved how the Fidler squad members would yell out encouragement as they went flying past me (I was flying on the inside remember). Even when I could only grunt unintelligibly in reply, they were incredibly supportive.

One of the highlights was Pat Carroll out on the course with his boom box blasting “Dancing Queen” by Abba and handing out jelly babies. Another was a group of slightly inebriated individuals who ran after me with beers insisting that I have one to sustain me through to the end of the race.

At about 1km to go I started to think about the finish and how much the journey so far has meant to me. Then I realized that I should actually finish the race first!

Chris had mentioned a few days earlier that I may get to a stage in the race where I feel that I cannot go on or where I may need to dig deeper. He suggested that I prepare something to focus on should this situation arise. I reflected on my time in hospital. I thought about how hard I had to fight to be able to walk. I clearly remember the first steps I took and how I had felt like I had won a triathlon when I walked 5 meters for the first time. I had to move with a walker and with another machine and a pole attached to drips, but I was walking. It hurt but it felt so good. Once I started the race on Sunday I never doubted that I would finish but in the last couple of kilometers I really had to dig deeper to keep the pace up. I thought about those first steps and how painful but rewarding they were and I knew I could keep the pace up. It really did help to get me through.

I have to say that lying back in the comfort of our apartment I am even happy with my blistered feet. They are not pretty but they have been through a lot. So I may give them a day or so rest but only so they will heal in time for the next challenge…

Kellie's Story - Part 5 (part 1 to 4 below)

Noosa, the adventure

Date: 28 October 2008
Goal:  Noosa triathlon 2 November 2008 (4 days to go!)

Wow, 4 days to go - I can’t wait! The most common question seems to be ‘Are you ready?’ I think I am. I can’t believe that I am saying that. The standard line for any self respecting triathlete is ‘No, I have not trained enough’, ‘I haven’t been training at all’ or ‘I have had the flu for the last 10 weeks’ etc...Just listen in at any transition area or coffee shop at a race. I am usually right up there with those answers and in many cases, when we compare ourselves to the next person in the transition area, we may appear to fall short of the perfect preparation. But the question, for me, is not ‘Are you ready compared to everybody else that is lining up on the start line?’ it is ‘Are you ready?’ With that perspective in mind I do feel that I am ready and excitedly looking forward to Sunday.

The Noosa triathlon, for me, is an adventure. Adventures usually contain an element of risk, a journey filled with challenges to overcome and then the reward of achievement at the end. This reward is all the more fulfilling when the journey is shared with family and friends. I believe we benefit from these shared experiences in life. These adventurous dreams make us feel alive.

I was speaking with a friend over the weekend whose dream is to fly. He has a passion for flying and has saved for lessons, studied hard, obtained different levels of pilot’s licenses and is on his way to becoming a commercial pilot. I am inspired by him and in admiration of his achievements. However, like me he has moments of self doubt and considers giving up his dream. Sometimes the adventure seems too big and the risk too great. Many of us have considered giving up on our dreams and trading in our adventure for the monotony of day to day life.

In the past when I have been asked ‘Am I ready?’ I have often thought that I am not, I have focused on all the training that I didn’t do, the flu that lasted all winter, the things that may go wrong on the day, the personal best that I may not achieve, or the anxiety I may feel in racing on the road again. When this happens I like to think about my dreams and goals. My goal is to race at Noosa this weekend, enjoy the competitiveness of the event and the camaraderie that Noosa is renowned for. None of the self doubts that I have had are worth trading for this experience.

So like my pilot friend who picked himself up and went flying the next day, I too am choosing to be ready to tackle the next adventure. I would like to say that ‘I am ready to fly too’ but apart from being a terrible cliché, it would also slightly overstate the pace that I will be running at around 9am on Sunday. Let’s just say I will be enjoying the adventure and flying on the inside…

Kellie's Story - Part 4 (part 1 to 3 below)

Date: 4 October 2008
Goal:  Noosa triathlon 2 November 2008 (29 days to go!)

Magpies, butcher birds and dunlop volleys

A few months ago my work colleague casually mentioned that he would like to ride to Cairns to raise money for the Royal Flying Doctor Service (RFDS). You know, a lazy 1700km or so. Now most people would bake a cake, sell raffle tickets, organise a car wash….but not Stephen. His heart is for adventure and his idea definitely roused my interest.

What if I rode with him for part of the way, as training for Noosa and also moral support for Stephen? The idea was borne that I would ride the first 100km leg to Nambour. All I had to do was get off the wind trainer and the bike pathways and onto the road.

The weeks flew by and before we knew it I was meeting Stephen and his friend Brian (who also planned to ride the first leg) at 5.30am, ready to set off on our respective adventures.

I have to say out of the three of us, I looked like the one with ‘all the gear and no idea’. I have a beautiful carbon Giant bike, matching carbon tri-bars, clip in cycling shoes and the most comfortable bib-n-brace ever - made by skins (I previously had no idea that skins made cycling gear, and they are awesome!) As a comparison Brian did not shave his legs, had a very old steel bike and wait for it…Dunlop volleys.

You can guess who spent the most time at the front and kicked butt up the hills. Yep, Brian the workhorse. He was unbelievable. (Stephen was saving a little in reserve for the next 1600kms.)

I finally moved my way to the front of our group thinking that I would give Brian a break and give my new tri-bars a workout. Once I hit the front I was repeatedly attacked by an obnoxious magpie. Stephen and Brian had a great time laughing until Stephen was attacked by two butcher birds that had joined forces in a relentless assault.

Stephen and Brian are great guys to ride with. They have each ridden for over 25 years and have lots of wisdom to impart on cycling and life in general. I noticed that they each worked hard but took time to enjoy what they did. I also learnt that eating huge, calorie laden Danishes, riding a steel bike and wearing Dunlop volleys are no impediment to cycling prowess. However, I will leave that up to Brian…I think he may be one of a kind and the only cyclist I know that can pull that off successfully.

Over 4 hours and 113km later we pulled into a park at Nambour, tired, dirty, and for me, having wrestled with a few demons (not the magpies!) Like many others that have been through a traumatic event, I have post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). This means that whilst the Nambour ride was largely a positive experience for me, it is not simply a matter of ‘it’s all better now’. Like anyone that has gone through trauma, the images and memories will never go away. The frequency of flashbacks and the severity of symptoms following a ‘trigger’ event may reduce but your life is forever changed.

My aim is to make these changes in my life as positive as possible. This is essential, not just for my own wellbeing, but for that of my family. My goal, as in the beginning of these blogs, is to complete the Noosa triathlon. Not to prove that I am invincible or with the false hope that it will wipe the traumatic event from my mind. I am doing it because I love to be a part of an adventure; I love the outdoors and racing with other people; I love to travel to new places and interact with different people. Everyone has their own story. When someone shares their journey with me I am inspired to keep going with mine. Hopefully that encouragement is something my journey can give to others.

Progression plan:

Stage 1 - Just Get On The Bike (mag trainer) 

Stage 2 - Get Out Of The Garage (cycling on bike paths)  

Stage 3 - Time to build strength and regain bike skills (mountain biking around Gap Creek and Daisy Hill)  done, blog coming soon

Stage 4: Back On The Road….  

Kellie's Story - Part 3 (part 1 and 2 below)

Date: 10 August 2008
Race report: Adventure race (swim leg)

The bike plans are coming along and I have progressed from the bike paths of Brisbane. There is however, the small matter of swimming 1.5km in a canal in a semi-competent fashion (read as, without drowning) on 2 November 08!

I devised what I thought was a logical plan. Get together a team to do the Anaconda adventure race with me assigned to the 2km swim. The race was scheduled for 10 August 2008, thus forcing me to get in the pool during winter.

The problem is that I strongly dislike swimming on my own (I get bored). I also have an aversion to swimming in freezing water.

Solution = Troy Fidler’s swim squads. They are on Monday – Friday at lunchtime in a heated pool and he makes training fun.

With 5 weeks to train before Anaconda, Troy was able to whip me into a somewhat drown-proof state. Armed with my trustee (10 year old) wetsuit I was confidently off to my first race in a long time.

Confidence in this instance has a very wide meaning. The morning of the race I was close to throwing up and could not eat my favourite ‘pre-race’ meal of banana and peanut butter on toast. I could not even drink coffee (this was obviously getting very serious). Chris managed to get me to eat vegemite on toast and drink half a cup of English Breakfast tea. He bundled me in the car for the trip to the Gold Coast.

The race went extremely well, I didn’t drown, improved my time from last year and got to race with a fantastic group of people (Chris, Damo and Porchey). My favourite part of the race was running with my team mate Porchey near the end. Porchey is a fantastic paddler (think World titles final against Trevor Hendy) who recently injured his knee surfing. It was so bad that he could not run properly and had an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon for the next morning. He is a gutsy competitor and for 1km he hobbled alongside us until he got to his ski. To finish he hobbled up the beach to cross the finish line with all of us. The feeling of finishing the race together was amazing. I think we would have carried him across the line if we had to (well Chris and Damo would have!)

Races are fun and winning is a bonus. Damo would probably like me to point out at this stage that we did win and that his kit was colour co-ordinated. Damo you are our idol…

Nothing compares to the relationships you build in life. Through my accident I feel that I value my relationships much more. You can’t take your race with you, medals, car, job or your status. But the relationships you build in life are what lasts and what (I believe) mean something in the end. I think this is why I enjoyed the team event so much. We worked together towards a common goal, overcame some setbacks and ultimately crossed the line together.

Kellie's Story - Part 2 (part 1 below)

Date: 7 August 2008
Goal:  Noosa Triathlon 2 November 2008 (90 days to go!)

Parents, prams and other things…

I have said goodbye to the mag trainer street gang and hello to the great open roads bikepaths of Brisbane.

My first venture taught me two things:

A little way into the ride Chris commented that my speed was really good. I was quite chuffed and like Pavlov’s dogs, I responded well to positive reinforcement, pushing even harder to win further praise…

With increased speed and resolve we passed many (very fast) walkers and even some (slow moving) cyclists. Ok they were kids on trikes but they still count! All of a sudden Chris asked that I ‘slow down’. I was almost shocked into stopping as I did not think Chris had the words ‘slow down’ in his vocabulary (Chris’ idea of safe mountain bike riding is to speed up as you are heading towards a big tree or a sudden drop off).

Chris rightly pointed out that the parents pushing prams and the many dog walkers may not feel that comfortable with me passing by at my newly found break-neck speed. Ok he was flattering me with the break-neck speed stuff. It was more a case of us acknowledging that there were simply too many people out enjoying the same bike paths. We gently cruised the rest of the ride while I made alternative plans for my training progression to the open roads.

Thanks to the awesome Noosa tri people I am now the proud owner of a beautiful Cannondale mountain bike. Selecting the ‘right’ bike was an interesting process. I would like to tell you that I conducted a comparative analysis on the functionality of hydraulic vs. mechanical disc brakes; that I pored over the bike’s specifications available on the Cannondale website; and that I considered my geometry and carefully matched it to that of the bike’s in aid of the perfect fit…

In reality I deliberated over whether I should choose ‘Patriot Blue’ or ‘Fine Silver’. Oh come on boys, you know you check out colour schemes too! (For the record I went with ‘Fine Silver’)

So far, things are travelling rather well. I am roughly between Stages 2 and 3 with 90 days to go…

And I have even gotten in the pool!

Progression plan:

Stage 1 - Just Get On The Bike (mag trainer);

Stage 2 - Get Out Of The Garage (cycling on bike paths);

Stage 3 - Time to build strength and regain bike skills (mountain biking around Gap Creek and Daisy Hill);

Stage 4: Back On The Road….

Kellie's Story - Part 1

Date: 30 June 2008
Goal:  Noosa triathlon 2 November 2008 (120 days to go!)

The alarm sounds beside my bed and I silence it almost simultaneously. No, I am not an assassin but I have trained myself to wake as soon as I hear the first sound so that I can kill it before it wakes my sleeping partner Chris and our two kids.

I used to love hitting the snooze button to get an “extra 5” before racing to get myself out the door and to training. But hitting the snooze button means that I am likely to wake everyone twice which I have worked out is not that considerate….besides hitting the snooze button risks not making it to training!

I’ll be straight with you. I am an ex-Cairns girl and I do not like the cold. I have an arguably high pain threshold but when it comes to the cold I am a wimp. In 2004 (pre-crash) I was priming myself for my first season training through a Brisbane winter. I went out and bought heaps of warm cycling clothes with lovely reflective stripping. I was very proud of myself and my “commitment” to training in the cold. My last memory before being hit by a car on 19 June 2004 was of talking to my training partner about the cold.

Now some would say a severe head injury, an induced coma, multiple fractures, collapsed lung, severed nerves and ligaments are a lot of trouble to go to get out of training through winter but hey I don’t do things by halves! Chris tells me stories of training in Canberra with icicles forming on the tips of his hair and I think give me a training session on a Cairns summer’s day. Bring on the humidity!

Well four years have passed and this is a Brisbane winter not a Cairns summer. It is time to drag myself out of bed, away from my comfortable, warm doona to face the music mag trainer. I enjoy the mag trainer - you can get a pretty good workout and listen to music at the same time with a brilliant view of Mt Cootha (from my place anyway!). My favourite band is U2. They are also the only band on my ipod so it is quite fortunate that I find them inspirational.
The “kids” Jayden and Jack (ages 10 and 3 respectively) have played a part in my progression from the comforts of the lounge room to the garage. This was because the noise of the mag trainer in the lounge room at 5am seems to interrupt their sleep…I am not sure why in a two bedroom house with wooden floorboards, but I have now progressed to the garage!!!

We actually have a bit of a neighborhood group thing going. The Dad across the road is on his trainer in the garage some mornings and Beth from next door is on her stationary trainer each day. It is good to know that I am not the only one! It is also a reminder that we each have personal challenges to overcome in our lives. The Dad across the road works full time and has teenage kids. Beth from next door is elderly with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). Everyone has their own challenge whether it is physical or mental. It inspires me to see everyday people getting out there and fitting in a session amongst the challenges of their everyday lives.

As much as I enjoy the mag trainer, my goal is to get back on the road. I watch packs of cyclists go past on their way up Mt Nebo and I long to be a part of it. At this stage I do not know for certain whether I will get back on the road consistently. I have thought about training primarily on the mag trainer in the lead up to Noosa. But I miss the long rides enough to work hard at getting back there. I particularly want to work on regaining some strength and bike skills without the additional stress of negotiating traffic. So with the help of some friendly professionals I have developed the following progression plan:

Stage 1 - Just Get On The Bike (mag trainer);

Stage 2 - Get Out Of The Garage (cycling on bike paths);

Stage 3 - Time to build strength and regain bike skills (mountain biking around Gap Creek and Daisy Hill);

Stage 4: Back On The Road….

At the moment I am between Stages 1 and 2 with 120 days to go….stay tuned.

April 2008

Emma Carney Joins USM for Century - read story

Emma Going Straight to Beijing - read story

May 2008

Stephen Meltz - Is He Triathlon's Biggest Loser? - read story

Aussie Cyclists Fly the Flag in USA - read story

Melissa Gorman Books Ticket to Beijing - read story

June 2008